Catching the Blessing of Eternal Life
by Michael Donovan

I began writing this reflection over 3 years ago, but I never finished. I guess I’ve always wanted my stories, whether happy or sad, to have a positive message at the end.  In this case, the murder of Christopher left me so empty at the time, that nothing I tried to write  provided  me solace regarding this senseless death.  Now several years and several murders later of young men I’ve known, I’m finally ready to finish this article.

I met him when he was 15, locked up at the Cook County Juvenile Temporary Detention Center, charged as an adult with first degree murder.  I remember meeting with him on one of his first nights in detention, his endless tears, his profession of innocence.  That meeting was the first of 68 visits, seeing him through every mood imaginable, as he patiently, but nervously awaited trial.  Sometimes our conversations were light; sometimes intense, especially before each court date.  We prayed at the end of each visit, and Chris always prayed for a blessing.  I can’t tell you the amount of times he said, “Mike, I just gotta catch a blessing.”

At 17, he was transferred to Cook County Jail, still awaiting trial, through countless continuances and delays.  My visits continued, but now our visits amounted to screaming  to each other through the thick glass of the jail’s visitor room. Chris also called and wrote to me on occasion.  In his last letter to me he wrote:
        “Mike, I’m just hoping for the best at trial.  I pray for a blessing.  Please continue to  
         pray for me, and tell Fr. Kelly and Denny as well.  Because Mike, I really need you.                  
         I’m counting the days.  They seem to be really going slow.  But it’s alright.  Be
         careful and take care.  Hope to see you on the outside, Mike.  Pray for me!”

After almost 3 years, Christopher was acquitted at trial in August.  He caught that blessing!

I wish the story could end here, a happy ending and the beginning of a second chance and new life for Christopher.  Unfortunately, the reality of gang life is different, and upon his release, he was back on the streets in no time.  I spoke to him briefly on 3 occasions, trying in vain to arrange a meeting to discuss his hopes and dreams, and the promises he made while he was locked up.  Somehow he seemed distant to me, and he was too busy to meet.
 
On Sunday, October 12, 2008, Fr. Kelly called me to tell me Chris had been critically injured, and was not expected to live.  He died the next day from the injuries suffered after a rival gang member rammed his car, grabbed him, and dragged him alongside the vehicle while fleeing the scene of the crash.

I asked myself all the questions one asks after someone you love dies senselessly and prematurely.  Why? Why after catching a blessing did he return to the streets? I attended two street prayer vigils, the wake, and the funeral Mass for Chris, searching for answers.

In time, my belief in God’s mercy and goodness, my belief in the Resurrection and in eternal life got me through this difficult time.  Certainly I heard Fr. Kelly preach this message at subsequent wakes and funerals for other youth.  It finally took hold.  I am comforted in the belief that Christopher is with God.  That’s enough of a happy ending for me.